The Art of Body Language

He's single, ladies.  The
Illustrious Tyler Huff.

I have a friend named Tyler Huff.  Let me tell you about him - I remember in high school I loved to talk to this kid.  Was it his charm?  His dashing good looks?  His passion on the fiddle?  Perhaps these all were factors - but I clearly remember being totally memorized by his hands as he talked.  They wiggled when he wiggled, they motioned a rainbow when he was talking about things that made him happy, they cried when he cried.  Gasp!  I'm sure you, my beloved readers, inquire within the deep chambers of your souls, "How may I myself master this thing called 'body language?'"

Let me tell you.

#1 - the FIST PUMP

Bam!  Let the world know you rocked it!  Passed that test!  Got that phone number!  Unsheathed that sword!  Wooed your beloved!  Bam!  You see it happen all the time.  After a most successful dance move, cheers go out.  Men yell.  Dogs bark!  The dancer victoriously swags his glossy golden has behind his face and FIST PUMPS IT!!  How can you become the wielder of this new gesture of the century?  Let's take a more scientific approach.

As illustrated by this beautiful chart, there are but three steps.

Step A: Mental Preparation - This is by far the most important step.  After a successful event and ego booster, clear your mind.  Look and your hand, observe it staring back at you.  You are ready to pump that fist high in the air!

Step B: Fist Extension - Toss that baby in the air.  Simple as that.

Step C: Swing Down - Thrust arm downwards, halting it halfway in the air.  You have successfully impressed everyone in the room.  Or at least yourself if done it private for secret fist pumping.  Shhh!

#2 - the HIGH FIVE

This is like unto a two-way fist pump.  Oh baby!  Easy enough, this move is mastered by elderly veterans and the young toddlers alike.  Extend the end.  Take careful aim of the other person's extended hand.  Thrust hand at the other.  Make a clapping sound, or if you're way awesome, some explosion might happen, as seen in the picture to the right.  'Nuff said.

Yeah!

#3 High Ten

This move is only for the expert ambidextrous.  This move also must be taken with some caution; a few people have been reported of being decapitated by this viscous, yet exciting body gesture (due to improper execution).  Beware!  The risk is high, but so is the pay off.  Perhaps you might want to wear safety glasses for your first couple of gos.  But follow the same instruction for high fives, but using BOTH hands.  Use both eyes to discern the appropriate hands needing slapping.  Thrust both hands in the correct direction.  BAM!  High ten!  According to the urban dictionary: a double handed high five, reserved for especially awesome scenarios.  

Well gang, body language away!  It truly is an art.  Happy motioning!